'Tourists' (brief short story)

At High Noon in New York City on May First of 2026, exactly 42 space aliens landed. They looked shockingly like humans. The main differences were they had extra large eyes and heads, 8-foot-tall bodies, long arms, almost no hair, and light blue skin.

After almost-soundlessly landing their spacecraft in Bryant Park, a small crowd began to gather. They surrounded the blue-green metallic, octagon-shaped, 76-meter ship – but kept their distance too. After two minutes at most the creatures emerged and briefly looked around.

A very average-looking one from the back spoke up: 

“We are Utu. We are tourists.” His English was perfect.

Many humans said “Hello!” and “Welcome!” and otherwise tried to talk with them. All felt a kind of portentous awe. It was clear these were impressive beings. After maybe half a minute of tranquil assessment and brief glances, one Utu stepped forward. He spoke calmly, but frankly and directly.

“Why are you such savages? Why do you behave like wild animals? Why do you prey upon each other? 

“We’re impressed by your cars, ships, planes, rockets, satellites, spaceships, telephones, radios, television, computers, highways, plumbing system, electrical grid, vaccines, drugs, organ transplants, and even nuclear bombs. 

“But why are almost all of you so criminal and tyrannical? Why do almost all of you systematically attack each other via government?”

The message was delivered forthrightly, respectfully, and intelligently to about 400 English listeners in the plain of the park. But almost instantly it was translated into essentially all human languages, and delivered all over the globe in holographic imagery. The space visitors directed that people transmit the answers to their questions to certain radio and space frequencies, as well as certain internet sites, which the Utu evidently could monitor. Then all 42 space creatures sedately returned to their vessel. Over the next few hours, as news reports confirmed this unprecedented visitation, many human beings warmly and fawningly welcomed the aliens, just as a small minority of people tried valiantly to respond to their critical inquiries.

But the replies evidently didn’t meet with Utu approval. At noon on May 2nd over 90% of humans died. Their intact bodies laid in the streets, parks, buildings, homes, transports, and other places where they unceremoniously perished. Cause of death was unknown.

The Utu repeated their questions. They added: “Why are you so illiberal? Why are you so irrational and senseless in your beliefs and behaviors? Why are you so self-hating and self-destroying? 

Moreover: Why do you so much reject reason and science? Why do you believe in ‘god’? Why do you believe self-sacrifice is a virtue? Why do you believe welfare statism is benevolent and beneficial?”

The remaining 81 million of so humans answered with renewed urgency. Elite think-tanks, universities, and journals made a special effort.

But these answers too seemingly met with minimal approbation. By noon of May 3rd about 3 million people were left. Close to two-thirds were Americans. Almost a million were Europeans, especially from the northwest and England. Fewer than a thousand were Chinese or Russian. This population decline left the survivors stunned and numb.

The Utu then had nothing more to do with humanity. They proceeded to tour the museums, art galleries, entertainment venues, tourist traps, major cities, and exotic plants and animals. By May 6th they were evidently fully satisfied – or fed up. Either way, they left.

But before they departed for good, the Utu transmitted a final message:

“Not all humans are complete barbarians and monsters – which is good. Those remaining should live much better now. All the illiberals are gone. All your major feral beasts. All your main thieves, assailants, tyrants, and torturers. But you need to watch out. Don’t repeat the mistakes of the destroyers. That’s no way to live, and we may come back.

“We leave behind the cures and treatments of your top ten diseases and injuries. We give you a nutrition and drug cocktail to triple your lifespan. But we won’t tell you how to defeat death. You’re unworthy. Try to do better before our next visit.”

VerminWorld

 

Why do I hate the guts of every last one of you, and hope you all suffer and die? Well, basically because you’re so loathsome and evil. You seem to be some sort of hideous, monstrous, alien species. And you’ve evidently turned this planet into a special Hell of your making. At the least, you demons have established Earth as something like an escape-proof, horrific, criminal, insane asylum.

When I was a few days old, for absolutely no reason, I was genitally mutilated without anesthesia. This probably caused profound and irreparable psycho-spiritual damage. I was raised by parents, teachers, and social leaders with systematic irrationality, senselessness, injustice, and immorality. Almost everyone I met believed in “god” and the virtue of self-sacrifice. I was taught to expect incipient nuclear annihilation. And I experienced gross sexual perversion and deprivation. Mankind’s heartless cruelty and immense destructiveness toward me never ended.

The intellectual dishonesty and cowardice of you people was stunning. Your intellectual, moral, and spiritual strangeness, hostility, and inferiority was extreme and appalling. Your illiberal philosophy, culture, lifestyle, and attitude almost couldn’t be more mistaken, disgusting, and depraved. And your welfare statist criminality and tyranny against me was and is ubiquitous and relentless.

So I hope you all suffer in misery and agony, and then die. A nuclear or bio-chemical war claiming billions would be nice. I want this not because I’m somehow low in character and virtue, or deficient in social skills. I wish it because you’re seemingly all beasts and devils who’re asking for this. Because you’re evidently all vermin who deserve it.

Selfishness and Greed

 

Selfishness is correctly defined as "concern for the self". Greed is correctly defined as "the desire and pursuit of values". Thus selfishness and greed are necessary, but not sufficient, for personal moral goodness. Selfish and greedy persons must also be rational, enlightened, and wise to be genuinely morally good.

Selfishness and greed – despite what virtually everybody has believed since about 500 B.C. -- are not necessarily or naturally anti-social or socially destructive. These two related virtues don’t necessarily or naturally involve predation or parasitism. Indeed, just the opposite. Society prospers under them.

Meanwhile, those who are anti-social, socially destructive, predatory, or parasitic in their behavior are not acting with rationality, enlightenment, or wisdom. They are not being truly selfish and greedy. With personal activity of this kind, almost never does the Holy Individual profit or achieve his values.

Those who break their diet and exercise regimen end up fat, weak, and unhealthy. This is not to their self-interest or greedy benefit. Those who fail to show up at their job, or work lazily or poorly, end up fired and broke. Their behavior does not constitute genuine selfishness and greed. Those who abuse or betray their family and friends end up disowned by their relatives and friendless. Such acts aren't seriously selfish or greedy. It’s obvious that those who habitually assault and rob their fellows wind up hated by all and in jail. And certainly those who generally act as monsters and destroyers in their lifestyle are failing to live up to the human ideal of being creative, inventive, and productive. They are damaging or surrendering their reputation, social trust, honor, pride, self-esteem, integrity, ideals, inner peace, and noble soul. The long-term and overall selfish and greedy rewards of such behavior is nil.

Perhaps in some limited and crude way such dreadful and failed people could fairly and truly be described as acting in a "virtuously" selfish and greedy manner. But such fools and scoundrels lack insight and cleverness. The absence of rationality, enlightenment, and wisdom in their behavior means they end up miserable and devastated. Such animals lose their humanity, vitality, vivacity, spirit, sense of satisfaction, feeling of confidence and tranquility, and almost everything that makes life worth living. Callousness, betrayal, brutality, robbery, and murder are not conducive to personal greatness and happiness. A person's real self-interest and best values are forfeited. Ultimately, such lowlifes and losers can accurately be described as self-sacrificing, self-immolating, self-repudiating, and self-destroying.

Not much selfishness and greed in that!